Wow! Thank you so much for the beyond nice comments on my picture. That is something else I've been thinking about, I think most women (at least those that I know) are not happy with photographs of themselves, but do we really put any effort into trying to change that? What I mean is I think if you take different shots of your self, especially your face, you can figure out what angles. etc. look best but I for one have always felt too self conscious to do so. It's that fear I've mentioned before of seeming to be full of myself or like I am "bragging", the same fear that keeps me from truly being proud of all the things I've accomplished. Truth is others may think just that, that I'm a braggert, etc. if I take ownership of things that I SHOULD be proud of or that I should at least acknowledge, but that doesn't matter. What does matter is I am kinder to myself, that I am not afraid of being strong or "too much" sometimes, because in reality that is who I am and the greater crime is how I tend to "dumb down" in so many aspects to be accepted. I have punished myself needlessly trying for this physical ideal, thinking then I could be fearlessly outspoken on fitness/nutritional topics for example. People look at me as if I must be talking out of my ass because I'm not a size 2 or they see me eating cheese fries and drinking beer. I have enough self imposed perfectionism and I don't need anyone else's, thank you. I see some pictures of myself and like them, but more often I hate the face I am making or the angle or you name it and I think if I will quit being afraid of so-called self absorption, and take steps to make friends with the camera, then more times than not I can be happy with what I see. Models spend years perfecting posing, etc. and yet the average woman thinks something is wrong with her if the image in the photograph isn't a great one.
Our outsides are just a facet of who we are, but it doesn't necessarily have to mean we are vapid or silly for learning to put our best foot forward.
I feel like I'm not communicating properly but I don't think I'll hit the backspace and erase it all.
Once again, your comments really made my day and made me look at myself in a different perspective, I plan on posting more pictures of myself, my family and the people and places I live with/around while I explore who I am further.