I had several ideas of what to write about in this space but my brain and heart are occupied with toddler issues. I just can't seem to muster an entry on things that have occurred to me lately to increase your fruits and veggies. I promise to stop writing these little blurby nothings and to actually update in the morning.
Sigh. Blogging is hard.

Just checking in to say I'm back from my weekend trip. I'm exhausted but excited about life, I had a lovely time. Plans are swirling around my noggin regarding my own personal development, things I'll do with my site www.zenerrific.com and some things I'll do here in the meantime.
Looking forward to catching up with all my blog friends and to writing more often, this week is the final week of my major rotation and though other things are coming up the major pressure should be lifted somewhat.
I'm barely upright so I'll say goodnight.

I started to write a whingey entry about how tired and sick and depressed I've been but instead:

Indonesian food is awesome, I will never attend culinary school though because I discovered how stressed out I get when cooking for others/with others that are judging. I thought it was simply stress of having people over or being at someone else's home (holidays) but instead it is the insane pressure I put on myself to cook perfectly. Certifiable.

I am still not 100% well but I am about to go for a walk anyway, I just ate so many biscuits + mashed potatoes + rotisserie chicken I am sick.

I'm sure I'll be inspired to post more after I walk a bit.

Argh. All I could think about earlier was how I would have a chance to workout today and I even mentally tried out what would feel best and decided on weights and a little cardio, elated at the idea. All I can think about is sleeping and so I am going to listen to my body but I am getting impatient. Damnit. And it is a beautiful day, all I can hope is that I will take a nap and wake up energized and ready to maybe do something fun outside with our son once I get him from school.
Got an A- on my research paper and am overjoyed about it, I actually dreamt that I got a D so this was very welcome. School is this.close to being out and I cannot wait!
Doing well on respecting my body and honoring my hunger in a positive way again now that my hormones are subsiding. Stupid hormones.

The last few days or so I've been feeling like my beautiful lie is crashing down around me. Never mind that for the past month I have felt phenomenal, looked the best I have in a long time, and been so much less stressed out and crappy feeling in general. All it took was maybe a day of wanting to stuff my face and experiencing exhaustion to make me doubt myself and my new found ability to trust my body. Guess what? I'm just bloated and hormonal and cramping and sleeping a whole lot extra...the way I am feeling is normal and will pass soon, hopefully any day now. With time I think I'll learn better ways to weather this kind of thing out instead of jumping to the conclusion that I'm rubbish and untrustworthy and destined to rip the seams on my trousers.
Another huge contributor to the way I'm feeling is only working out twice in the past month, that is just very un-Erin-y but I finally had to let something go in order to preserve my sanity and for a bit I even let cooking go and ate takeout several times a week. School just got INSANE for the past month as you can see from my lack of posting and I found out today that all my classmates have felt the same way for the past month. Thank goodness I chose to break loose from dieting and guilting myself over workouts at just the right time.
I'm headed to bed now even though it's not even 9 but I am so damned tired and am hopeful that I can ride my bike or whatever strikes me in the morning, I am so excited to workout again I can hardly stand it.
In summary: things are going well but my hormones make me crazy sometimes and school is almost out, yay team.

I'm working on a research paper that is due wednesday that I've left until last minute. I was able to test my new found skills (listening to my own body) Saturday night and even did fairly well with it in regards to alcohol, something that at times (many times) has not been easy for me. I think I've braved all my old anxiety causing situations and come out unscathed.
Today I found out my dad is taking pills again and I am having a worse case of munchies than usual but nothing outrageous.
I am okay, I won't let him drag me down this time. It's nice to really like myself again.
I'll post as I'm able, I'm reading when I can, take care all you wonderful people.

My little one is very sick, caught the cold my husband got that I think I have been fighting somewhere deep in the Land of the Forgotten Sinuse Passages (aka way up in my noggin' somewhere).
Did an hour of yoga the other night and felt great but have yet to do it again even though I have had the desire just because of my time constraints. Doing the clinical rotation thing wears me out though not as badly as before and I have projects all coming due, only a few weeks left in the semester. I've stopped beating myself up if I can't work out as much as I want to, I know I'll be waaaaay more active when things slow down a bit and I'll just do the best I can right now.
I've had some struggled lately with food and trusting myself to do the right thing and there's lots I need to explore on here but I just can't right now. My little guy just wants me to hold him and it is so pitiful-wish I could make him better. If I haven't mentioned it, thank you to everyone that has been commenting-I get so excited when I see someone left me a note, I wish I was better at responding immediately. Please reference time constraints and management issues.

eep! How do the days just fly by without real time for me to post anything? Tuesday and then again today I've been experiencing weird hot flash type fever feelings and my balance has been really out of whack, the floor feels like it is moving some times when I am just standing around, it really got bad when I was standing in the doorway of a patients room looking at his chart but I think I played it off. Tuesday I just got extra rest and felt pretty good yesterday, good enough to knock out 30 minutes on the elliptical last night (which did NOT squeak by the way, yay) and then it just hit me hard out of nowhere this afternoon. I had to skip out on the DD@ meeting (the local dietetic association)which disappoints me, my friends were all going, it was at the restaurant we had our rehearsal dinner at and dinner is free and two great speakers on diabetes were scheduled. I can't help feeling all crazy though and when I feel badly I just want to go home, I hate sitting somewhere feeling ill.
My son has just redecorated the entire living room floor with toys in an effort to get my attention and so once again, this is cut short. At least I got something out...

I'm back in Dallas and had a great weekend and feel happy. Lots to talk about but for now I have to do some last minute studying for my Foodservice mgmt exam this morning.

LME, thanks for the kind words, it has been quite a few past days, let me tell you. You have to let me tell you because it's my blog. Ahem. Stress mounted up big time with projects and programs that didn't save my work despite my repeated clicking of the save button and then Friday....Friday I got seriously ill, had to jump up in the middle of a guest lecture and oh the details of woe I could relate but I'll just let you know I left school without even telling any professors, crawled in to bed shaking, skin hurting, and commenced to being sick up until today with a violent stomach virus that left me six lbs lighter in only about three days. Not good people. Saturday night was hell, oh man, but last time I had this I ended up in the hospital (I am not a good little puker/pooper, I take it to the extreme apparently) and so this time getting to stay in my own bed was a bonus. I missed essentially three days of class though so that is big time boo hiss.
Tomorrow is my first day of ambulatory care, and what that means is I meet with a client (rather than patient in the hospital) and do a 45 minute counseling session with her. This is cool but scary considering I've never done that before and I'm graded. Bah, whatever, anything is better than what I've dealt with lately.
I've barely been able to eat and walk so just cleaning house today a bit was a big improvement, anxiously awaiting getting back to yoga etc.
PS I ate several turkey sandwiches, the only thing that would do. More on that later.

I'm up ridiculously early in order to do last minute studying for a big exam today. So, obviously I am wasting the precious slumber I sacrificed if I sit here too long but I wanted to update a bit. I'll be making the rounds (reading/commenting) this afternoon more than likely, once the pressure is off about this test.
Hit the gym at school in between classes yesterday and knocked out 30 minutes of cardio. Felt ravenously hungry most of the rest of the day and my internal thermometer was all out of whack, I felt like it was 90 degrees inside when it was only 75, I just wanted to climb out of my skin.
This morning I finally look a bit leaner again and I can actually feel my triceps. I just went through such a weird bloated time that I of course started freaking out that nothing I am doing was working. It does happen damnit! I've witnessed it in blogland, so there.
Three workouts in four days and tomorrow will be 4 workouts in five days. I'm earning sparkpoints rapidly, now if I just had an Internet program that encouraged me to study. Oh wait, that's what I need to do to GET A JOB EVENTUALLY.

I would like to update but just typing this is painful. We just texturized our entire two car garage in two days and my grip strength better be improved by all this damnit. And I was worried about getting enough exercise in with Husband home and a longer drive to the gym.
M@rla, thanks for leaving comments, it makes my day. I'll type an actual entry when my hands are not hurting. I have blisters and some serious soreness.

Chris thanks for stopping by, sorry to all that I've been MIA lately. Not a lot of working out going on, just lots of stress and a huge knot in my back again.
The knot was from our couch, it's too soft and when I sit on it a lot (usually with my laptop) and also happen to be stressing at the same time it hurts my back. I haven't sat on it for two days now and no pain so I'm fairly certain that is the cause.
I am exhausted and my final is tomorrow morning at 7:30 am. So many things are going on, I am just not up to posting about it all but I haven't exercised since Saturday morning but I did get that 30 min heart pumping walk in and I also ate exceedingly well all weekend at the in-laws, my kryptonite.
So, still here-reading your pages when I can, currently exhausted.

Sorry, still been sick and taking exams right now, and I'm in sort of a weird head space right now. Be back as soon as possible.

ETA: META COME BACK!