It's a new year, I'm still a bit fuzzy headed from the severe reaction I had to New Year's Eve festivities and so hence forth have not visited all of your lovely blogs yet. But I will, yes.
Where does 2009 find me? I've been feeling a bit lost and confused and mad and sad and down in the dumps alternating with a determined cheerful sort of grimness.
Two major things I am thinking for myself in this new year: Following the mantra"Just do it" and asking "Is it the best thing for me today?" with a thought towards self care and care of my family. So to put these into action: Old way of living I hate to say: "Wow, the house looks like crap and there is stuff everywhere to be put away but I am so tired and I'll do it later and I'll just sit here and wallow." New way: Hmm so I've been violently ill the last day and a half and rode home for 4 hrs today and I'm beyond tired, wish I had it in me to get this place in order. Well how 'bout I go shower and then at least put a load of clothes in the wash? Hm I can take out the trash from the bathrooms and the Little One's room, kitchen, etc. Hey I'm making progress just doing a few things! Doing some Wii fit games keeps popping in my mind, I'm just going to do it since I keep thinking about it." and then I did thirty minutes of Wii fit despite running into obstacles that could have put me off. The feet that allow you to use the balance board on carpet are missing (two of them) and the remotes are almost dead. The damn thing told me I hadn't been on it in fifty days and then sarcastically called me the wrong name like it didn't know me anymore. I've done other things Wii! Get off my back yo.
House is semi cleaned up and I did a small workout (about 200 calories for 30 minutes which is not stellar but a damned site more than you burn sitting on your bum I'd reckon).
I am done talking and ready to start doing and to quit whinging so much and to spend less time sitting around (mainly online, I don't really have a teevee problem) and so there you have it.
I'm not sure what direction I'm going to go, I may kick it old school and weigh in on Fridays and report it here etc. I've avoided accountability for ages and it makes me feel a little squirmy to admit to myself and to you that I am just not happy with my current state and way of doing things and that I'm going to really do something about it. If you don't tell anyone then no one knows when you fail.
And as for the self care portion, instead of blundering along harming myself and others I absolutely vow to stop, ask if what I am doing or contemplating doing is best for me or the person it affects and then proceeding likewise. That would have ruled out the extra long cheese coney, tots and rootbeer for lunch today for sure. I'll expand more but my miniscule attention span has already wandered.
Hope everyone is well or on their way to being so.