Cloudy

I'm not really sure what I am doing or what I am feeling right now. We had to put our beloved pet to sleep yesterday morning and it has rocked my world to say the least. Yesterday was a blur of sadness and tears and heartache and today I feel sort of numb and empty though my mind keeps filing away each situation that it is obvious she is gone. I keep thinking I need to open the back door to see if she is ready to come in or I need to get up early to let her out or I hear noises and think it is her for a split second, only to realize she is gone. Forever.
She was over 12 years old, I met her when she was only 4 so she was very special to me too, one of the smartest and most loving animals I ever had the pleasure of knowing. My husband got her when she was 6 weeks old and raised her from a puppy. When he went to pick out a pup here came one with huge paws and the breeder's laundry in her mouth and he knew. The lady didn't want to giver her up but I guess money talks.
RIP Dixie, I loved you so much and I miss you.